Book Review: Friendships that bind through war

Updated 26 May 2017
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Book Review: Friendships that bind through war

Alawiya Sobh's “Maryam, Keeper of Stories” is a story that explores the lives of a few Lebanese women during the Lebanese Civil War. It was first written in 2002, originally in Arabic and won the Sultan Qaboos Prize. Nirvana Tanoukhi translated it into English 10 years later.
The book begins with a narrator named Maryam who is looking for Alawiyya Subuh, her writer friend who was going to write and publish Maryam’s story, and the stories of her family and friends, Ibtisam and Yasmine. But Alawiyya has disappeared, as has the story, “And all that I told her passed into nothing.”
With the disappearance of Alawiyya and Maryam’s looming emigration to Canada, she recalls everything she told Alawiyya of her past and her family’s past, sometimes angrily, sometimes somberly, wondering why Alawiyya did not keep her promise and write down their stories.
“She moved among us like a thief, picked up our stories as they slipped from our mouths into the room, pocketed them and stole away.” Did the stories themselves drive her away?
As Lebanon passes in and out of wars and invading armies, sometimes the Syrian army, sometimes the Israeli army, Maryam remembers, “In the old days, my room was a shelter for their stories and secrets.” She is a refuge for her friends as they weave themselves into life under warring factions and political instability where they must build and rebuild accordingly, when nothing is certain. And yet, despite their close bond, Maryam, Ibtisam, Yasmine and Alawiyya — who become closer than ever as the war continues, supporting one another, both physically and mentally — somehow drift apart when it is over and life moves on.
“I’m not sure why, but while it strung us together like the beads of a necklace, the war drove others apart. Then the necklace broke, and I came to wonder if we had come together to create our own world when the one around us had collapsed.”
And while the war hangs overhead, it is not the only backdrop for Maryam and her friends. Through relationships, marriages, politics, brief loves and tragedies, the women change and adapt, sometimes for the better and other times for the worse. “In avoiding the others, each of them flees from the war and its memories.”
Through her mother, a deeply religious woman, with a sharp tongue and no time for emotions other than anger and regret, and each generation of her sisters, Maryam learns of the harsh realities and softness of life and duty. Maryam recalls that her Mother’s fingers “had become so hardened and dry with the laundry and hot dishwater that the skin had become numb to fire itself.” It is through her duty that she loves her family, unable to express it any other way. And her father, who rode on camel-back between Lebanon, Syria and Palestine to pick up and deliver carpets, and struggled to find work in Beirut, the “world had taught him to be a man since boyhood, and he believed that men could have no childhood.”
Sobh writes a powerful book that speaks as a last refuge for Maryam and the people in her life. The relationships she writes of are more than just friendships, they are connections that have clasped onto each other’s hearts.
She writes of the powerful histories and bonds between women, mother and daughters, sisters and friends, tied together by a link so strong, they cannot be broken, even if the friendship changes. They are a part of each other’s lives and histories, telling their stories to one another “so we could be mirrors in which to discover their many faces and ours.”
The book is written with a kind of introspection of someone who has stood on the brink of death and looked onto the other side. It makes one remember everything, the good and the bad, giving both value, knowing that in a second everything can disappear. But there is humor and even laughter in the face of trauma. Life encompasses all emotions in Sobh’s book, taking with it the beauty of life and nature as well as the ugliness and uncertainty of it all, and the imperfect relationships that tie people together.
Sobh directs her reader down a beautifully tragic, real and witty path of life, one that holds a place in one’s memory more than in real life. The people she speaks of and the Lebanon she recalls may not exist anymore except in the memories of those who remember.
The book is fraught with death and love, love both pure and impure, and mostly messy. It is about love that has no clear path, and relationships that cannot be described in a single word. It is a story that grows as do all stories, but one that eventually encompasses you, through Sobh’s multifaceted characters and the history of Lebanon and the relatability of the people who make it so.
The book is full of introspection that is not only eye opening, but inspiring. The assumption that life is either one thing or the other is quickly dispelled in this book. Life is an amalgamation of every feeling and emotion, the good with the bad, and it is every individual who is responsible for themselves, as Maryam’s mother says, “To be a bird is flying, the bird must fly, but if he sits still, he may as well be a stone.”

— Manal Shakir is the author of "Magic Within," published by Harper Collins India, and a freelance writer. She lives in Chicago, Illinois.

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What We Are Reading Today: ‘Good Vibes, Good Life’

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Updated 16 June 2024
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What We Are Reading Today: ‘Good Vibes, Good Life’

Author: Vex King

“Good Vibes, Good Life: How Self-Love is the Key to Unlocking Your Greatness” by Vex King is a self-help book on cultivating a positive mindset and emotional well-being. The author shares his own personal journey of overcoming adversity and tells how he developed practical strategies to improve his outlook on life.

It has an approachable and conversational tone. King writes in a personable manner, sharing his personal experiences and lessons acquired, making it relatable and relevant for readers.

The book covers a wide range of themes, including how to manage negative thoughts, practice appreciation, set boundaries, and discover your purpose.

King presents a variety of real exercises and tactics that readers may use right away to transform their mentality and improve their mental health.

The chapter on self-love is particularly impactful. King emphasizes the importance of being compassionate and accepting toward oneself, which he argues is the foundation for developing healthy relationships and achieving personal growth.

However, I felt that “Good Vibes, Good Life” sometimes tried to simplify complex emotional and mental health issues. While I appreciate the author’s goal of providing easy-to-understand self-help advice, there were times where the messaging felt too simplistic.

Another thing that gave me pause was that the author often did not use scientific research to support ideas. As someone who likes to see evidence-based information, I would have preferred if the author had included more references to psychological studies and expert opinions to back up his recommendations.

Instead, the book mostly relies on the author’s own personal stories and experiences. While those personal anecdotes can be compelling, I don’t think that automatically makes the strategies universally applicable to everyone.

Finally, I had mixed feelings about the work’s broad scope. On the one hand, I appreciated the wide range of topics covered; but on the other, I felt that certain areas could have benefited from a more in-depth, nuanced exploration, rather than a relatively surface-level treatment.

Overall, “Good Vibes, Good Life” is an uplifting and practical guide that can help readers develop a more positive and fulfilling outlook on life. The author’s personal anecdotes and straightforward advice make it an easy and engaging read.

It is a good option for those seeking to cultivate more joy, peace, and emotional well-being in their life.

 


What We Are Reading: ‘A Field Guide to the Larger Mammals of South America’ 

Updated 17 June 2024
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What We Are Reading: ‘A Field Guide to the Larger Mammals of South America’ 

Authors: Richard Webb & Jeff Blincow 

South America’s wide range of habitats support a tremendous diversity of plants and animals, including more than 400 species of larger mammals— those the size of a guinea pig or bigger. 

Many are truly iconic: jaguar, puma, ocelot and numerous other beautiful cats; the fantastic maned wolf; the incomparable giant Anteater; and an incredible variety of extraordinary primates.


What We Are Reading Today: ‘Strabo’s Geography’

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Updated 15 June 2024
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What We Are Reading Today: ‘Strabo’s Geography’

Author: TRANSLATED WITH COMMENTARY BY SARAH POTHECARY

Strabo’s Geography is an encyclopedic description of the ancient world as it appeared to a contemporary observer in the early Roman empire.

Information about taming elephants, collecting saffron, producing asphalt, and practicing yoga is found alongside accounts of prostitution, volcanic activity, religious festivals, and obscure eastern dynasties—all set against the shifting backdrop of political power in the first century CE.

 


What We Are Reading Today: Artemisia Gentileschi and the Business of Art

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Updated 15 June 2024
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What We Are Reading Today: Artemisia Gentileschi and the Business of Art

Author: Christopher R. Marshall

Art has long been viewed as a calling—a quasi-religious vocation that drives artists to seek answers to humanity’s deepest questions. Yet the art world is a risky, competitive business that requires artists to make strategic decisions, especially if the artist is a woman. In “Artemisia Gentileschi and the Business of Art,” Christopher Marshall presents a new account of the life, work, and legacy of the Italian Baroque painter, revealing how she built a successful four-decade career in a male-dominated field—and how her business acumen has even influenced the resurrection of her reputation today, when she has been transformed from a footnote of art history to a globally famous artist and feminist icon.

Combining the most recent research with detailed analyses of newly attributed paintings, the book highlights the business considerations behind Gentileschi’s development of a trademark style as she marketed herself to the public across a range of Italian artistic centers. The disguised self-portraits in her early Florentine paintings are reevaluated as an effort to make a celebrity brand of her own image. And, challenging the common perception that Gentileschi’s only masterpieces are her early Caravaggesque paintings, the book emphasizes the importance of her neglected late Neapolitan works, which are reinterpreted as innovative responses to the conventional practices of Baroque workshops.

 


What We Are Reading Today: ‘Healing is the New High’

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Updated 14 June 2024
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What We Are Reading Today: ‘Healing is the New High’

Author:  Vex King

The self-help book, “Healing is the New High,” attempts to teach people how to embrace recovery from trauma and reclaim power in their lives.

Written by Vex King, a prominent figure in the health and personal growth community, it provides strategies for overcoming life’s problems and nurturing inner peace.

King’s central message is that healing can be a potent avenue for introspection and transformation. The book, published in 2021, is written simply and in a warm tone, as King seeks to relate to the struggles people experience on a daily basis.

Every chapter can be read as a standalone, so readers can start at any point in the book.

King writes candidly about facing emotional pain in his own life and how he overcame it.

There appears to be a fair amount of repetition, but it could be argued that King is attempting to reinforce key concepts.

And while the ideas he is promoting may not be entirely novel to seasoned self-help readers, the way he presents his own personal struggles makes this a special read.

It is a powerful and insightful book that offers a holistic approach to personal growth and transformation.