What We Are Reading Today: ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’

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Updated 21 March 2025
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What We Are Reading Today: ‘How to Win Friends and Influence People’

  • The book blends psychology with actionable tips, demystifying what drives human behavior

Author: Dale Carnegie

Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends and Influence People,” first published in 1936, is still a staple of the self-help genre.

Its advice on building relationships and navigating social dynamics has not lost relevance. The central idea? Ditch the self-focused mindset and prioritize empathy — Carnegie insists real influence starts with authenticity and mutual respect.

The book breaks down his philosophy into straightforward rules: Don’t criticize people, give honest praise, and get others excited about their goals.

He also stresses the value of listening deeply, famously noting that you will make more friends by showing curiosity about others than by trying to impress them.

Packed with stories — from boardroom deals to casual chats — Carnegie shows how humility and emotional intelligence can turn conflicts into collaborations.

What makes Carnegie’s approach work is its simplicity. He avoids slick manipulation tricks, arguing instead for small, sincere gestures.

Sure, advice such as smiling more or using someone’s name might sound obvious, but these acts of kindness lay the groundwork for trust.

The book blends psychology with actionable tips, demystifying what drives human behavior.

Some critics call parts of his formula outdated, but Carnegie’s focus on understanding others hits home now more than ever.

His ideas have shaped everyone from Warren Buffett to today’s startup founders, proving that connecting with people never goes out of style.

For modern readers, the book does two things: It calls out our habit of treating relationships like transactions, then hands us the tools to fix it. In a world glued to screens, Carnegie’s push for genuine, in-person communication feels almost revolutionary.

“How to Win Friends and Influence People” is not just about climbing the ladder — it is about doing it without losing yourself.

As Carnegie wrote, “Success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.” Nearly 90 years later, that balance still defines his message.

 


What We Are Reading Today: ‘On Pedantry’ by Arnoud S. Q. Visser

Updated 13 January 2026
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What We Are Reading Today: ‘On Pedantry’ by Arnoud S. Q. Visser

Intellectuals have long provoked scorn and irritation, even downright aggression. Many learned individuals have cast such hostility as a badge of honor, a sign of envy, or a form of resistance to inconvenient truths.

“On Pedantry” offers an altogether different perspective, revealing how the excessive use of learning has been a vice in Western culture since the days of Socrates.

Taking readers  from the academies of ancient Greece to today’s culture wars, Arnoud Visser explains why pretentious and punctilious learning has always annoyed us.