ALKHOBAR: For thousands of first-grade pupils across Saudi Arabia, the start of the academic year is heralded by a sensory overload: arches of vibrant balloons, wrapped gifts, music and decorated classrooms. But past the festivities, at the edge of the school gate, the reality of the transition often looks very different.
For a child tightly gripping a parent’s hand and refusing to cross the threshold, the noise and crowd do little to ease the shift.
As families settle into the new school year, educators and child mental health experts are cautioning against orientation practices that prioritize entertainment over emotional readiness. Forcing reluctant children into group games, criticizing pupils who struggle to detach and relying on elaborate distractors can undermine the true purpose of introductory programs: Helping young children navigate their first sustained separation from home.
The Ministry of Education designs introductory-week programs to gradually integrate first-graders, instill positive attitudes toward campus life and alleviate separation anxiety. Yet, experts highlight that crying or clinging on the first morning is a natural human response, not a behavioral failure.
“A child who cries on the first morning is not necessarily telling us that something is wrong,” said psychiatrist Dr. Samaa Al-Mulhim. “They are entering an unfamiliar environment, meeting unfamiliar adults and suddenly following a routine they have never experienced before.”
How adults manage those initial high-stress minutes dictates how quickly a child adapts.
“One of the mistakes is expecting every child to react in the same way,” Al-Mulhim said. “One child may walk into the classroom immediately, while another may need several days before feeling comfortable. Forcing participation can make the child associate school with pressure rather than safety.”
Reframing the morning ritual
For parents, striking the balance between firm encouragement and empathetic support at the drop-off line can be daunting.
Majda Al-Ajmi, whose 6-year-old daughter entered first grade this term, spent weeks preparing by shopping for supplies and shifting sleep schedules. However, she quickly discovered that over-emphasizing the transition backfired.
“Everyone kept asking her, ‘Are you scared about school?’ and I noticed she started thinking that maybe she should be scared,” Al-Ajmi said. “So, we stopped making it such a big event and started talking about normal things — what she would take for lunch, meeting her teacher and choosing her bag.”
When the morning arrived, her daughter hesitated at the gate.
“My first instinct was to tell her, ‘You’re a big girl, don’t cry.’ Then I realized that probably wasn’t helping,” Al-Ajmi said. “I told her I would come back after school and let the teacher take over.”
Validating a child's emotions while offering structural certainty is far more effective than dismissive optimism, according to Al-Mulhim.
“When adults say, ‘There is nothing to be scared of,’ they may mean to reassure the child, but the child is still experiencing fear,” Al-Mulhim said. “It is more useful to acknowledge the feeling while giving them something predictable: where the parent will be, when they will return and what the child can expect during the day.”
Structure, sleep, and attendance
Predictability begins long before the bell rings. A common pitfall for families is attempting to reset holiday sleeping patterns at the last minute.
Badr Al-Shammari learned this firsthand when preparing his son for first grade after weeks of late summer nights.
“During the holiday, he was sleeping very late and waking up around noon. We thought we could fix it two or three days before school, but it was much harder than we expected,” Al-Shammari said. “The biggest problem wasn’t the school itself. He was exhausted. Once his sleep became more regular, his mood completely changed.”
Another hurdle is treating orientation week as optional. Analysts and educators cited by Saudi newspaper Al-Watan highlighted parental tolerance of first-week absences as a primary factor weakening the transition. They also cited excessive gift-giving without educational intent, unhealthy food, verbal criticism and forced activity as key missteps.
Intermittent attendance forces a child to restart the emotional heavy-lifting of separation repeatedly.
“If the child attends one day, stays home the next and then returns, they repeatedly restart the separation process,” Al-Mulhim said. “Consistency helps them learn very quickly: I go to school, I spend part of my day here, and my parent comes back.”
Measuring true progress
For school counselors and teachers, quiet observation during orientation is often more revealing than a child’s willingness to join in festive games.
“Forcing every child into the same activities can hide what they are actually experiencing,” Al-Mulhim said. “Some children need time to observe before they participate, and that does not necessarily mean they are failing to adapt.”
Instead of expecting immediate enthusiasm or a total absence of tears, parents and educators should look for subtle trajectory shifts over the initial fortnight.
“We should look for change,” Al-Mulhim added. “Is the child becoming slightly more comfortable each day? Are they beginning to speak to their teacher or another child? Are they eating and sleeping normally? Those small changes tell us much more than whether they cried on the first morning.”
While most pupils adjust within a few weeks, persistent distress — especially when accompanied by somatic complaints, severe sleep disruption or refusal to stay on campus — may require tailored support from school counselors.
For parents like Al-Ajmi, success is not defined by instant excitement, but by steady emotional safety.
“I don’t need her to come home saying she loves school after one day,” she said. “I just want her to know that tomorrow she can go back and she’ll be OK.”
