Why every day should be Children’s Day

The UAE marked the first Emirati Children’s Day on March 15 to coincide with the approval of "Wadeema's Law" (the UAE Child Protection Law) in 2016. The law was informally named after the appalling case of an eight-year-old Emirati girl who was tortured and killed by her father and his girlfriend, and the day was established in an effort to raise awareness of children’s rights and provide information on how to raise them in a safe and healthy environment.
Against that backdrop, and over the past few weeks, an official government representative used social media to voice his opinion on matters pertaining to societal and family values, including the role of women both socially and professionally. His viewpoint, while resonating with a few, was met with numerous raised eyebrows on account of his limited understanding of the modern dynamics of families and the changing roles of parents today. While the point here is not to scrutinize his clear gender bias, it is important to highlight the irony.
Curious to understand his stance on family values, I explored his social media account further, and was disappointed to notice the overwhelming exposure of his young daughters’ personal and private daily activities, including times when they were asleep. I am by no means an expert in childhood rights or parenting, but I believe that a child’s fundamental right is to be protected.
The protection of children must be first ensured by the parents, then by the family and community, and then by the government. The roles and responsibilities of each differ. A government’s role is to provide an effective protective system that includes laws, policies, procedures and practices intended to prevent mistreatment, violence and discrimination against children, and to promote well-being, care, health and safety.
We all understand and agree that we must protect children from verbal and physical abuse, violence and exploitation. However, childhood protection goes beyond the parameters set by UN agencies and governments, especially in our local and Islamic cultures, where a lot of subjects are still considered taboo.
 

There is no more important task for any society than protecting its young people, a responsibility first of parents, then of family and community, and finally of the government.

Asma I. Abdulmalik

I have previously written articles on sexual harassment and exploitation, highlighting how we have encouraged and normalized a culture in which it is OK to speak and act inappropriately toward the opposite sex. The realization is, however, that this culture and behavior was not born overnight; rather it was was instilled early on, whether consciously or subconsciously, from the childhood phase.
For example, in our culture, boys are expected and conditioned to be masculine, aggressive and emotionally suppressive. We shame young boys by telling them not to cry or run like girls, misguiding them to believe that there is something fundamentally weak and wrong with expressing emotions or, worse, with being a girl. You may ask what has that got to do with childhood protection? The consequences of shaming alone manifest over time to become complex psychological issues such as anxiety, stress, depression and difficulty in relationships.
Another equally important social convention is using physical means to discipline your child. This, of course, is a universal dispute between those who believe a light spank is fine, and those who completely reject it. The point is not to determine where we draw the line, but that physical abuse has been normalized on the ground that it raised a generation of well-adjusted individuals. With more awareness, families are realizing that physical abuse does not necessarily lead to good behavior. However, we still hear of individuals who almost proudly brag of how they were physically abused as children, and are doing the same to their own.
The other question is, when does it stop being a private family matter and become a state concern? When do we need to protect children from the very people who are supposed to guarantee their protection?
Protecting children also involves guaranteeing love, care and attention. It requires us to understand that their privacy is a responsibility we must not take for granted or exploit. With social media being the dominant medium for sharing our personal lives, we have all witnessed the outpouring of pictures and videos of children to family members or strangers, and perhaps even done it ourselves. Yet we don’t stop for a second to consider that we may be risking their safety. By no means am I arguing for a complete restriction of digital sharing, but when parents reach the stage where their children become props, or a means to social media fame, then that is where one draws the line.
Safeguarding our children requires collective action. Not only do we need to raise the awareness of the community to detect early all kinds of abuse, and respond to victims’ needs, but we also need to explore the idea of introducing these sensitive subjects to the children themselves. We are already educating them in schools and at home on verbal and physical bullying and abuse. Is it perhaps time to formally introduce to children in school and at home, using qualified educators, lessons on inappropriate behavior, sexual harassment, exploitation and other forms of abuse?
After all, aren’t we are all striving to raise creative, loving and unique individuals?

Asma I. Abdulmalik is an Emirati civil servant and writer interested in gender and development issues. Twitter: @Asmaimalik